Anointing

Father, I hope that what I did was right when I anointed our home with oil today. Before I started, as I closed my prayer with the words, "In Jesus name", was that You in the sunshine that suddenly came out and flooded the room so that even with my eyes closed I noticed? So perfectly timed it was...

After our Sunday school teacher informed us that he had done the same, it just seemed like it was the right thing to do at our home. You know I've never really done anything like that before, except in my old New Age days (which made me feel weird), so I do pray you will honor my intentions in doing so now. I know it is merely a symbol, but I prayed my way around the house outside, anointing every door and window, and then inside the house doing the same, especially in Chris' room, praying the Holy Spirit would be through the whole house, that evil could not live or remain here.

May it be so, Lord, may it be so.

Thank you for answered prayer yesterday. I was up at the alter praying for C and B's hearts to be warmed toward each other during the church service and by lunch B started to talk about how maybe we could start praying together for C, that he wanted to work with me, that the wall of unforgiveness was not working. Little did I know he had read this very blog about how alone I felt regarding parenting, why I couldn't go to him. It is strange how You worked through my own words, unbeknown to me, to help him see things in a different way. Just by knowing he would want to pray for C together shows me his heart is warmer. Right there at the restaurant the tears just started to slip out I was so thankful. We have wanted to pray together for some time and always stumbled and stopped. Now we are going to try to recommit to that important part of our marriage.

During the service yesterday there was a marriage renewal ceremony for those in the church that wanted to do so. A great many couples went forward including K and her husband. K is battling, what seems to be a courageous but losing battle with cancer. She is stick thin and walked painfully to the front. Everyone who saw her was so struck to the core that this could possibly be their last year together even though they are only in their 40's and have teenage children. It was heartbreaking to hear "Until death do us part" knowing theirs could be much too soon. They cried. We cried. God bless them, Lord. Keep them in the palm of Your hand. Grant them strength, comfort and peace.

God bless our Sunday School teacher, B, who made the tough decision to stop teaching our class in lieu of furthering his evangelism with kids. It is the right decision even though we will surely miss his insight, knowledge and instruction. It was not a big surprise to hear he had decided this and when I think of all the kids he will bring to You, then how could we not let him go in kindness? So please bless him in this venture.

Thank you for a good week ahead. Thank you that the new integrative doctor will accurately diagnose me. Bless the people who will perform the ultra sound on my thyroid and may all the other tests have no mistakes to alter the findings. Guide me, direct me and all the professionals as well regarding what I should do. Only You know if this is what will help me in losing weight, lessening the headaches, etc.

Help us to be ever closer to you, Lord. Help us to be who you want us to be.

I love you,

Laura

Worry/Fear/Stress

Lord, you know what's killing me right now. You saw and heard me on my knees at 5:30 am petitioning you because I could no longer sleep. I read Proverbs and it only made me feel lousy. Help me get through this. Help me to be stronger. Give me a new way that may penetrate. Help me to have peace because my stomach, as so often is the case regarding my son, is in a knot. I am at a loss. Ever I try to make things change and ever does he insist on keeping things the same.

Yesterday sent me totally over the edge and I'm still not recovered. I felt shell shocked afterwards that he displayed such behavior over such a minor thing. But he wanted it so he was bound and determined to get it and when I said no the games began. I look at other parents who are almost gleeful in making their kids sweat so they can learn a lesson. You did not seem to create me with that gene because all I feel is pain and always I feel like a lousy parent. Sure, I'm compassionate and forgiving and loving and supportive, but that is not enough. I try to set limits to the point where he won't outright rebel. I have disciplined him as a child (though no one would know that now looking at him) growing up. I tried to teach him right from wrong. And he is not a bad kid, but he is totally self absorbed and of this world and has no ambition. The slacker skateboard dude. Arrested development personified at age 18. Who is this child that came from my loins? Why did you give him to me if I am such a lousy parent? Thank God the love is there, the love is there on both parts, but it's bruised and battered on my end a lot of the time. I am so tired. I am begging you. Please help. Show us each the way...

Lent

Lord, thanks for the learning lesson this morning. Wow is all I can say. And the lesson took me from hopelessness to hopefulness. Left to my own devices I spiral down to the black abyss. Note to self; always hang on to God and He will show me the way. Why do I forget that?

I have never done the whole Lent thing. Did not grow up with it and always thought it was a Catholic ritual. But now attending a Methodist church I understand the intent behind it and I like it. It's a time of self reflection, of discipline and sacrifice. Not that those things "count" in salvation, but certainly they can be good tools on the path of spiritual growth and in addition you know, Lord, I need discipline in my rebellious nature. So thank you for directing me to the book on Lent at the library and I pray that I can take these 40 days to daily dig deeper with You.

Thank you for the transformation of Laura. I know I can't even see it sometimes, but when I look back on the last few years it is humbling and amazing.

Prayers always for my family and for so many who are in such dire need of your comfort and peace around this world where evil lives. Be with us, Father God, through all we must endure. Help us to understand.

Thank you for finding me again.

Laura