June 27, 2008

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

Wow, Lord, I knew changes were coming, but I did not realize how far reaching they would be, sweeping across most all of my life! Yowza!

Father I thank you for opening my eyes the last few weeks and realizing I have now entered a new season in my life. I am withdrawing a bit from all the church activities and concentrating on You, on my husband, and I am realizing it's not so selfish to take care of myself. I may not be number one on the list, but I've definitely pushed myself up a few notches.

After that hurtful email I cried out to you as I felt so alone. I did indeed hear you say, "Come to me" in an almost audible voice. I took it seriously and now I see it wasn't just for that but for many things in my life. Come to me directly. There is a time and a place for classes and talking to fellow sisters in Christ. And then there is the time to go directly to You. To lean more on You. To strengthen my faith in You.

And when I sought You in Your Word there was nothing but confirmation there, sending me to Isaiah, it blew my mind that it underlined indeed I should be taking this posture. Ben seems to be in wonder about it, but is grateful as I think I was starting to create a separation with all the things I was involved with. So silly , Lord, because as you know, I have always preached (in a prideful way) that I was against this very thing, that I am not a Martha (shouting to the rooftops), oh no indeed, I am a Mary! Ha! how you help us eat our words and humble the prideful.

Lord, THANK YOU, for putting Kathy's name in my mind to tutor Chris for his GED. And THANK YOU that he consented. Now I ask that they get along well together (though I could not think of a better match) and that Chris will take advantage of this opportunity and open himself up because Kathy could very definitely rub off well in so many wonderful ways on him, including showing Your face to him. I am literally the only adult who encourages my son and I have been asking You send someone else that isn't just "mom". Thank You for laying this before him.

You have made me SO see that I have much to learn about my pride. Not that I didn't know about this before and have laid it before You in the past, but - whew - how far reaching it is in my life - even to accepting people to help me lose weight and get my health under control

And speaking of my health - how wonderful to start gaining energy already, and to be sleeping better is beyond great. Thank You! Oh it feels soooo slow, but You are with me all the way.

I love you, Lord Jesus.

Thank You for all you have done and continue to do in our lives.

Amen

Tim Russert

Lord, you know what a good and fair man Tim was in this volatile political climate. I enjoyed his human take on politics in an unbiased manner, his love of family and faith that he never lost as he grew more successful, his big smile and sense of humor that never was far in any given situation.

We don't know, Lord, why you took him, especially in a year when many could have used his wise words, but we hope he is now basking in the wonders of Your glory.

One thing I do know is that it is surely a learning lesson in caring for one's health and how I must focus on taking care of myself no matter what more than I ever have before. As I am now on an active diet and exercise plan I can sometimes whine and complain about it, but this gives me a wakeup call why it is so important to do what I am doing and with fervor.

Be with his wife, his young son, his father as they grieve the loss of a good man.