Thankful

Lord, I'm thankful for a couple of peaceful days. No drama. Time to renew my strength and see the light again. The tattered and frayed edges are mending a bit.

I pray that Chris arises today with a drive to move forward in his life. Bestow upon him maturity, Lord. I pray that Ben has a good day and sees hope in our future together where we can live north again one day. I pray for M. in the loss of her mother and all that follows a death. Help us, her sisters in Christ, to be able to provide whatever she needs emotionally and physically. I pray in thankfulness for J. who is 6 months clean today. May time create a firm foundation away from that lifestyle. I pray for K.C. in need of healing. I pray in praise for healing of D.P. and I pray for Pastor K. who is such a blessing to our church, but who is trying in many ways of his life to grow.

I ask you to help me as I prepare for the class I am giving at the women's retreat in January. I so want the women to want to seek a deeper relationship with you, to create quiet time so you can speak to their hearts, to create their "secret garden" with you. Please give me the words to say, use me as you will, to convey this to my sisters.

You were with me yesterday when I stepped on the scale and my heart sunk in desperation and battled going to that dark place all day. Thank you that you helped me not go there and pointed me to the small and better steps toward a better life (at least I hope so - can't you hear me begging?!?!). One day, one meal, at a time. Please, I pray, you help me to get where I have wanted to be for so very long. Balance. Balance. Somehow with your help, more then I've ever needed it before.

Thank you for helping me be more disciplined in many areas of my life. You know all of those areas I have such a hard time surrendering to you. Create in me a new heart and a new understanding.

I long for a dog, but it's not the right time, so thank you for my two cats, Lucy and Georgie, who are filled with unconditional love and who are such a part of me and my life. Thank you for their quirky spirits and how they come running to my voice and wind through my legs purring. We don't know if pets go to heaven but I am hoping you'll find a place for our beloved friends.

So, here I go on with the rest of my day. Be with me in thought, spirit and words.

Amen.