Tuesday

Thank you, Lord, for sustaining me last night when I was the table leader at the Bible study. I had burdens on my heart, but you were able to help me through. More so I am grateful that afterwards B and I were able to talk in such a way that cleared the air, had us see things in the proper perspective, that we reunited in a strong way.

I know you heard C declare yesterday that he was an agnostic and my heart sagged that he had made a choice whereas up to now he was undecided. He says he is open to Christianity but cannot see it is true. He says he has asked you to reveal yourself to him for years and you have done nothing. I silently prayed to give me the words to say to him. I told him you are all around him if he would just look in a different way, but I understand at his age he wants to "see" you to believe you. I, too, have begged for you to reveal yourself in such a way he could not deny you, and while he is still open to you (I am so afraid he will close that door completely). I don't understand, Lord, why you can't make yourself more apparent to him. I have to trust your ways but it is so hard. Please hear this mother pray for her son, that he will know, love, trust and accept you. At least he believes there is something that created us. He sees nothing but Christians and "religious" man made rules and what can I say? He's right in much of what he says and sees. Too many professed Christians doing things that repel people away from you and your salvation. It makes me heartsick. I was once there also. But if you brought me back to you I trust you will with C also. So, I calmly relayed my beliefs, told him not to look at man or even church, but to you alone and to keep seeking. Oh, God, may it be so.

Thank you for giving me the wise decision not to take on yet another position with a church opportunity. Though I am flattered to be asked to be in the position I realize it is not the right thing for me and I only have so much strength for things these days. As Merry's words often come to my mind, "every opportunity is not a calling". I will concentrate on the things I have a passion for.

I ask you to bless the devotional book we will soon be printing. I feel more responsible than anyone because I edited it, put it together, chose the art and the online publication source. So many have asked about it and I pray that they will not be disappointed, that it will be a great fund raiser for many charities to your glory, Lord.

Thank you for the strength and hope I have asked for. Get us through these trials by fire right now. C has a place he thinks he might want to work at and I told him no $$ until you apply for a job there. Please, Lord, get him on his feet and moving forward in his life and help me to be encouraging but strong with him.

Humble my heart, Lord, release my pride in the areas of my body images and others (you know what they are). Thank you that I started a food diary yet again. You know I find them endlessly tedious in time, but I hope this will be a new start that can last. Help me to get more exercise then I have, to be mindful of all food choices during the day.

Help me always to be grateful for all you have given me.

In Jesus name I pray.

Amen.